I yearn so much for sunlight that I awake hours early, only to find dark and rain. Each winter seems darker and longer. I retreat into the hovel of my apartment and sleep long hours with the cats. Alcohol and cannabis anesthetize me. Without job duties, I pitter patter, looking through photos and slides. The images elicit memories of the possibilities I never pursued, the loves I never enjoined, the successes I never embraced. Namaste